Love is.........

 

     As Valentine's Day approaches, naturally, I got to thinking about Love and what it really means.  Real Love goes far deeper than a dozen roses and a mushy card on a Hallmark Holiday. In our 4 years and 7 months of Marriage, I've learned a lot about Love and Marital Love.  It's a daily choice.  It's not something we feel like doing all of the time, but it is for better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do us part, just as we promised each other on July 8th, 2011. 

1.  Real Love sees his wife thru 4 bouts of cellulitis. 
2.  Real Love makes Lifetime health and dietary changes (resulting in substantial weight loss) with his wife, after she is diagnosed with prediabetes. 
3.  Real Love makes sacrifices to work hard to get out of debt just 1 year after we got Married.
4.  Real Love grows stronger, thru the caring of (in addition to becoming his power of attorney) a parent with cancer, in the hospital and nursing home, after only just over a year of  marriage.  Real Love is being there together when that parent breathes his last breath and enters into the arms of Jesus.
5.  Real Love is holding each other up when we felt totally out of control after I was admitted to the hospital the day after we planned his Dad's funeral.  I was hospitalized for 3 nights, and had my dead and gangrenous gallbladder removed.  Jonathan was there for me, even thru his own grief of losing his Dad.  I got released from the hospital, and we went straight to his Dad's memorial service.  That was a very difficult time for us, but God was Faithful and we are stronger together because of it.
6.  Real Love is there for you when you find out your Mom's cancer spread to her brain, and later her lung.
7.  Real Love holds you up when you find out your "little" Sister's 37 year old Husband and Father of 4 of your precious Nieces and Nephews has a rare and aggressive cancer, of which there is no cure.

We've celebrated our 40th Birthdays together, and have seen some amazing places together in our travels, Upper Michigan, Aruba, NYC, Boston, Florida, etc.  We try to live life to the fullest everyday, knowing that we aren't guaranteed tomorrow.  We love to bless others together, which is something else we wouldn't be in a financial position to do if we weren't together.

We have been married just over 4.5 years, but I feel like we've experienced a lifetime of ups and downs in our relatively short time of being married.  We are stronger together.  Our Wedding verse was "God sets the Lonely in Families." ~Psalm 68:6.  God knew what we would have to face in the future, and I'm so thankful he brought us together to support and love each other in the best and worst of times.  Life is tough, but God is Faithful! :-)

Yes.  He did get me a dozen roses and a super sweet card, for which I'm very grateful! :-)  But this pales in comparison to the unconditional love he has shown me in the past 4.5 years. 

Jonathan, I love you so very much, and there is no one else I'd rather experience the highest highs and lowest lows of life with.

Happy Valentine's Day Baby!

Always and Forever Yours,


Your Irish Hills Hottie!  ;-)

Gratitude For God's Gifts of Love to Me - Week 4

My Year of Thanks!

April 10th - April 16th, 2015

 

Not Gonna Lie!  This was an incredibly hard week to stay grateful!  April 9th we found out that my Brother-in-Law very likely had cancer.  Then on April 15th, we found out he has a very rare form of Sarcoma cancer.  At times I went for days without writing down the 3 things I was grateful for each day.  The important thing, is that I went back and actually wrote 3 things down for each day I missed. I started my "Year of Thankfulness" on March 20th.  Little did I know at that time, how challenging, yet important it would be for me to continue to be grateful, regardless of the circumstances in my life or in the lives of those I love, and no matter how "down" I felt.  God is Good!  All the Time! 

April 10th

1. Cookie Butter
2. Decaf Coffee
3. The Weekend - After a Very Long Week.

April 11th

1. Natural Vitamin D - NOT in the form of a pill!
2. My "baby" Sister Debbie.
3. My 2.4 lb weight loss.

April 12th

1. Shawn Holtgren - He's a great Friend & Encourager to us - Oh, he Married us too!! ;-)
2. The fact that I don't need bifocals.....yet!
3. Great Vision Insurance.

April 13th

1. Weight Watchers low point, yummy ice cream treats.
2. Two hours of Overtime.
3. Sunshine.

April 14th

1. I got our taxes done/filed.
2. We owed less in taxes than we did last year.
3. My Sunrise Simulator.

April 15th

1. My Awesome Friend Mary
2. My Awesome Friend Alice
3. My Awesome Cousin Chad

April 16th

1. My Co-Worker Beth coming back to work, and lightening my work load.
2. "Oh my God, He will not delay, my refuge and strength, Always!" - Great Lyrics from a song that was on the Radio during my drive home from work. Very timely lyrics!
3. Dinner with a Great Friend - We encouraged each other.  What a Blessing!



Happy Valentines Day To The Love Of My Life!!

It really is true what they say, that after you have been Married for a while, Valentine's Day isn't nearly as big of a deal as it used to be.  When I was Single I always felt left out and felt as if my Singleness was accentuated on that day.  Everyone else had a Valentine (or so I thought), but I didn't.  I have learned that Real Everyday Married Love goes so much deeper than the love that can be expressed on February 14th every year. 

Real Love is choosing to change unhealthy lifestyles together because of your love for the other person and your love for yourself.  Real Love is supporting each other thru caring for and watching a parent die of cancer.  Real Love is being there when your spouse is hospitalized and has surgery even though your Dad just died 2 days prior.  Real Love is going with each other to the grave sites of our earthly Fathers.  Real Love is going to support a loved one during a sentencing hearing.  Real Love is choosing to love each other even on days when we don't feel so lovable.  Real Love is living everyday life with all of it's stressors and ups and downs.

We have lived a lot of life in our 1317 days of Marriage.  The loss and struggles we have experienced together, have only made us stronger.  Together we have accomplished far more than we could have individually.  This Covenant Marriage is no doubt God's design.  We aren't the same people we were the day we got Married.  Jonathan hit his goal weight at weight watcher's today.  He is 115 pounds lighter than the day we got Married.  I have lost a lot of weight myself.  We are also debt free.  Both weight loss and debt loss require sacrifice and not giving in to our every whim and feeling and want.  Going thru these processes together has taught us discipline.  We are Happy!  We are Healthy!  We are Blessed!  We are Thankful!

I Love You Baby!  There is no one else I'd rather be doing life with!  Thank you for your extreme patience with me thru all of these lovely hormonal changes that no one warned me about!  You are the Best!  You are one of the hardest working, most caring, most loving, most accepting people I know!  Thank you for Daily Teaching me about Love and Grace!  I can't wait to share your 40th Birthday with you at Fenway Park!  I know we will feel God's presence and your Dad's presence in those precious moments together!  We leave on our NYC/Boston Trip in just 140 days!  In 144 days we will celebrate our 4th Wedding Anniversary and in 146 days we will be at Fenway Park celebrating your 40th Birthday while we watch the Red Sox hopefully beat the Yankees!  I cannot wait to experience that with you because I love You! 

Happy Valentine's Day Mr. Stanley!  I will love you until God calls me home...cuz...well...I am the "Cougar" in this Relationship! :-)

Here's to many more Valentines Days together, but most importantly, many more days of living everyday life together!

I am SO PROUD of You and Proud of the Man you are, have become, and are becoming! 

Love Always,


Mrs. Stanley

Balance - J-La-Sta Style

Balance Is.......... 

 

 

 

• Eating 1 or 2 Servings of Edy's No Sugar Added Half the Fat Ice Cream instead of eating no ice cream at all or eating half the container.  
• Walking 10,000 Steps 5 days a week instead of not walking at all or walking 10,000 steps 7 days a week.
• Using 1 lb hand weights over my 45 minute lunch walk on Monday, Wednesday and Friday instead of not using weights at all or using them all 5 Weekdays.
• Being on Facebook a little bit each day instead of being on it all the time or giving myself a week or 2 off of FB altogether.

 

I have a long ways to go, but for being such an all or nothing person, I think I've made great strides in finding balance in my life! :-)

 

 





Weight Watchers Plus Determination Equals The Incredible Shrinking Couple! :)

1.  He Loves Me!  My Husband loves me so much that he started walking/losing weight with me after my pre-diabetes diagnosis in February of 2012.  He said he knew that it would be easier for me to change my habits if we both changed them together.  That is love!  In January of 2013 when I decided I wanted to join Weight Watchers Online, he decided to also join Weight Watchers Online the very next day! Even though he gets to eat more than me, it is SO MUCH easier navigating this weight loss journey with both of us being on the same page!  We are Blessed! :)

2.  We Are Determined!  When we say we are going to do something, we usually do it.  I am typically a woman of my word and he is typically a man of his word!  My Goal is to reach 135 lbs by my 40th Birthday!  Jon's goal is to reach 190 lbs and be below 200 lbs for the first time in his adult life!  Jon is currently 78 lbs lighter than our wedding day (July 8th, 2011).  Wow!  He is amazing!  I am currently 52.4 lbs lighter than I was on my 38th Birthday (January of 2012).  Jon has 21 lbs to go to reach his goal and I have 21.6 lbs to go to reach my goal.  We can and will do this!

Top: Jen on Jan 2nd, 2012 at 209 lbs/Jen on Aug 31st, 2013 at 156.6 lbs
Bottom: Jon (243 lbs) & Jen (189.1 lbs) on Jan 4th, 2013/Jen (156.6 lbs) & Jon (211 lbs) on Aug 31st, 2013

3.  Our Success Is SO MUCH More Than A Number!  Yes, It's true, the number on the scale tells us how much we weigh.  It is a good guide to go by when trying to get healthier, but it's not the only guide.  We are eating healthier, we are fitting into smaller clothes, we have gained some muscle, and we feel so much better about ourselves!  Partly, because we are accomplishing something we didn't think we could accomplish before.  We know we are getting healthier, and losing weight the right way. We LOVE FOOD.  We LOVE food that is bad for us!  We are REAL people who have real struggles.  We don't have a personal chef or personal trainers.  If we can lose weight, anyone can!  I kicked pre-diabetes to the curb, and THAT FACT is more important than any number the scale tells me! :)

4.  My Husband Goes On Hikes With Me!  I love him!  I married him for love.  I married him because I knew God made us for each other.  Did I ever think he would go on hikes with me?  No.  I honestly didn't.  Did I want him to?  Yes.  God is SO GOOD.  He has blessed me with more than I could have ever imagined!  I believe God is making us even more compatible with each other though our weight loss journey.

5.  I Will Be Extra Fabulous at Forty!  I seriously am looking forward to this next decade of my life!  I will be starting it off in ARUBA with my HUSBAND, at my goal weight!  I never would have thought I'd be at this point in my life (Married AND going to ARUBA!) if you would have asked me 6 years ago.  God's plans are always Best!  Even if I look good enough to wear a bikini, I won't wear a bikini.  I have 5 surgery scars from my gallbladder removal just 6 months ago.  I'll wear a Tankini and look just as fabulous!

6.  Weight Watchers Works For Us!  Weight loss is one of those very personal issues that a person has to want to do on his/her own.  Did people tell me I should eat healthier and lose weight before?  Yes!  Was I ready to listen?  No!  But when I decided I WAS going to lose the weight and get healthier, nothing could stop me!  Well, I've had hiccups...like gaining 7.6 lbs on our Anniversary vacay.  It's not always smooth sailing.  We are human.  But we just keep on keeping on and persistence and following the Weight Watchers Points is giving us results.  Sometimes not as quickly as we'd like to see them, but we are seeing results.  I can now see pictures of myself and say...I sure look good!  I have gained confidence and pride in knowing that I am doing what I said I would do.

I'll post again when we get to our goal weights.  In the meantime, if you have any questions, about Weight Watchers, just let me know!  I will always need the boundaries of weight watchers.  I love food too much to not have the boundaries weight watchers provides in our lives.

Live & Love With URGENCY!!!!

 

Life is short!  You may be thinking, "Yes, I have heard this many times before...blah blah blah!"  I know we have all probably heard this saying hundreds of times in our lives, but do we really believe it?  If we do really believe it, are we living like it is true? 

"Learn to live life with a sense of urgency, because even if you get to live a long one, it's still incredibly short.  Don't save things for a special occasion.  Go out and do the things you want to do, tell people how you really feel, and stop wasting time and energy on things that really don't matter."  AwesomeLifeTips.com

I'll be the first to admit that I'm a saver.  Friends gave us a bottle of chocolate wine as a Thank You gift in April.  I'm saving it for our 2 year Anniversary in July!  :-)  If it weren't for my Husband, I probably wouldn't have a whole lot of fun.  We really balance each other out!  I help him save more and he helps me spend more.  We make a great Team!  I think saving for Retirement is a very good and responsible thing to do.  However, I also know many people who never made it to Retirement age before they were called home to Heaven.  We are taking the advice of my late Father-In-Law and, while being financially responsible, we are planning to travel now, while we are relatively young and healthy.  There are no guarantees in life.

The following portions of Scripture also point out how short life is:

"Teach us to realize the brevity of life so that we may grow in wisdom." Psalm 90:12 NLT

“Lord, remind me how brief my time on earth will be.  Remind me that my days are numbered—how fleeting my life is. " Psalm 39:4 NLT

     Our days are numbered!  Two weeks ago a 6 year old girl was murdered by her father in our apartment complex.  This week I attended a visitation for a co-worker who was in his 20's.  A 22 year old son of a lady from my former Church died this week as a result of injuries suffered when he was shot 6 months ago.  A friend's Brother died at age 41 last year.  My Dad was 59 when he passed away on 12/8/1999.   My Husband's Dad was 67 when he passed away this February 26th.  You get the idea.  Not everyone lives to be 90 years old!  I've heard friends say things like "I'm not ready to lose my Mom/Dad yet!"  No one is EVER ready to lose a loved one!  However, when we will lose loved ones is completely out of our control.  It is up to God.  Loss hurts and it stings deep.  You never "get over it"!  But God is Good and He will heal your heart and enable you to comfort others with the comfort you have received.

     Those who know me, know that I am a Numbers Gal!  I love dates and numbers and countdowns! :)   I was blessed to have 25 Years 11 Months and 5 Days of having an earthly Dad.  That's 9,470 days!  My Dad has already been in Heaven for 13 Years 6 Months 1 Week and 1 Day.  That's 4,939 days!  A new Chapter of my life began when I started getting to know my now Husband.  That was 3 Years 8 Months and 1 Week ago!  That's 1346 Days!  My Husband and I were talking about what we miss about his Dad who passed away 3 Months and 3 Weeks ago.  Only 110 days ago.  He then asked me what I miss most about my Dad.  I told him I miss the fact that my Dad was analytical and the most like me, and the one person in my family who "got" me.  I've been thinking about my Husband's question a lot.  After 13.5 years, so much of my adult life has been lived without my Dad, that it's sometimes hard to remember what I miss about him.  There are now so many memories that don't include him.  This makes me sad.  No one can ever take his place, but last Father's Day was Awesome!  For the first time since my Dad passed away, I had a Father figure in my life....my Father-In-Law.  He loved me to pieces and always told me how great I was and how Jonathan and I light up a room when we walk into it, etc. etc. etc.  I miss him so much!  This is my Husband's first Father's Day not having an earthly Father.  Please keep him in your prayers.

I want to live my life as if everyday will be my last, or the last of those around me.  I am FAR from perfect, but I know if I look at life in that light, that I will treat others better.  I want them to see Jesus in me.  I want others to know that they are loved unconditionally, with an everlasting love!  I want them to know that there is life, hope, laughter, love...both here and in Eternity!

Will you do it?  Will you Live and Love like today is your last and/or the last of those around you?

Three things will last forever—faith, hope, and love—and the greatest of these is love. 1 Corinthians 13:13

I Want To Live Like That!

"I Want To Live Like That!"
by Sidewalk Prophets

This song has really touched my heart ever since the first time I heard it! The lyrics are incredibly powerful and thought provoking! I've been meaning to blog about it for months, and decided to finally do just that this evening! This song really makes me think about how my words and actions can either show others the love of Jesus or possibly turn those who are searching for truth, away from Jesus.  If you have a few minutes, I encourage you to watch the video/listen to this amazing song!

Here are the lyrics:
The lyrics are bolded and my comments are in Italics.

Sometimes I think
 What will people say of me
 When I'm only just a memory
 When I'm home where my soul belongs

What do I want to be known for when God calls me home?  What Legacy do I want to leave here on earth? 
Was I love
 When no one else would show up
 Was I Jesus to the least of those
 Was my worship more than just a song

I want to be known as someone who loved others well, even "the least of these", like Jesus did!  I want my worship to be a way of life, and not just an hour on the weekend!


I want to live like that
 And give it all I have
 So that everything I say and do
 Points to You

Yes, I really do want to live like that!  I want to be intentional about loving others and pointing others to Him!

If love is who I am
 Then this is where I'll stand
 Recklessly abandoned
 Never holding back

GOD is Love!  I am human and therefore imperfect, and cannot give pure unconditional love, but I plan on giving it all I've got, with the help of my Savior!


I want to live like that
 I want to live like that

Am I proof
 That You are who you say You are
 That grace can really change a heart
 Do I live like Your love is true

I want to live like His love is true, trusting boldly in his promises!  Grace can and does change hearts everyday!

People pass
 And even if they don't know my name
 Is there evidence that I've been changed
 When they see me, do they see You

I can and want to tell others about Jesus, but I don't have to use words.  People notice those who are "different from others in the way they live their lives".  I honestly do believe that actions speak louder than words.  I want people to see Jesus in me without me having to say a word!
 
I want to live like that
 And give it all I have
 So that everything I say and do
 Points to You

I want my life to point to Him!
If love is who I am
 Then this is where I'll stand
 Recklessly abandoned
 Never holding back

"Never holding back".  Never is a tough act to follow, but all I can do is pray for strength to love others well and be a witness to others simply by the way I live my life.

I want to live like that
 I want to live like that

I'm going to need lots of help!  I do know that His strength is made perfect in weakness.
I want to show the world the love You gave for me
 I'm longing for the world to know the glory of the King

Life is short!  I want everyone to know the love my King gave for them!

I want to live like that
 And give it all I have
 So that everything I say and do
 Points to You

It's easy to judge and find fault with others, but it takes a lot more effort to just love them where they are at!
If love is who I am
 Then this is where I'll stand
 Recklessly abandoned
 Never holding back

I want to live like that
 I want to live like that

I want my life to be a testimony of His AMAZING Grace!

The J-La-Sta 10,000 Steps Walking Challenge!

On December 29th, 2011 I mentioned on Facebook that I would be starting The J-La-Sta 10,000 Steps Walking Challenge.  I also mentioned that I would be posting a blog shortly regarding the details. This is that blog! :)  I am SO excited to start this Challenge and to have you join me in this Challenge!  I believe that if we have others to be accountable to and hold each other accountable, we are more likely to succeed.  Even if you only take 10 steps more tomorrow than you did today, that is a Success!  I know how overwhelming the number "10,000" sounds!  I've been thinking about when this challenge would start and I've finally come up with a date.  That date is Sunday, January 8th, 2012.  Why January 8th?  Well, you see, I wanted to give you all enough time to get a pedometer if you didn't already have one, and a chance to start walking for a few days to see how many steps you walk in a typical day. January 8th is 10 days from when I first mentioned this challenge and it is 5 days from the posting of this blog. So, you have 5 days to get your Pedometer and to start walking before the challenge starts. The 2nd reason I chose January 8th as the start date is that I have gained weight since I got married 6 months ago (July 8th, 2011).  I want to lose weight for the 2nd 6 months of my Marriage! :)

 Here are some important things to remember if you are considering taking part in this challenge:

• The challenge will go for 12 weeks to get us thru the winter months.  The challenge will end on Saturday, March 31st, 2012.

• You do not need to start at 10,000 steps a day!  If you haven't been physically active, this would be a very bad idea!  You need to work up to 10,000 steps a day.  For example, when I started approximately 3 weeks ago, I started at 6,000ish steps.  I am now up to 7,000-8,000ish steps per day.  I am gradually working toward 10,000 steps a day. Before I started walking I bet I was doing 3,000 steps or less per day. Once I get to 10,000 steps per day on a regular basis, I'm sure I will have some bad days.  We are all human.  That's OK!  Just start again the next day!

• The Pedometer I currently own has proven to be my best one yet!  I have owned it for 4 weeks now and it is still working.  It doesn't give extra steps while using the restroom, and it doesn't make the annoying clicking noises.  If this Pedometer is not in your Budget, that's ok too, any Pedometer is better than no Pedometer!  I promise you my steps have increased just from wearing a Pedometer! I'm such a numbers gal, and anal too!  Here is the link for the Pedometer I have: J-La-Sta's Pedometer.  Here is a picture of it.  I even get to wear it around my neck!  Have I mentioned that I LOVE my new Pedometer?! :)   It even keeps the past 7 days steps in it's memory.
• You may say, "This weather is horrible (if you live anywhere near the Midwest!), it is too cold and there is too much snow!".  In that case, can you find somewhere indoors to walk, ie, a mall?  I have been walking on a 100 step walking path in the basement at work on all of my breaks.  As my Dad frequently quoted my Grandma, "Where there is a will, there is a way!". 

• You can track your steps on the following website: http://www.10000steps.org.au/.  It takes 2 minutes to set up an account and the website is super user friendly.  If you FB message me with your personal email address after you have created an account with thatemail  address, I can add you to the team.  We can see each others daily steps and therefore can cheer each other on and encourage each other! :)  Please remember they are in Australia, so they are already on the next day when you may be tracking your steps in the evening. They also list the day before the month when listing the dates, whereas we list the month first and then the day.

• I promise to encourage you to succeed! Any step toward taking better care of ourselves is a step in the right direction.  Look at it this way, even if you only end up doing an average of 7,500 steps a day, I would bet that is more steps than you are taking on a daily basis today.                                     
• If you are anything like me and are currently experiencing the post holiday/winter blues, getting moving can help with depression!

• I will be thinking of a small prize for the the person who walks the most steps between January 8th and March 31st.  There will also be a 1st runner up for The J-La-Sta 10,000 Steps Challenge.  If that winner or 1st runner up is me, I will still get myself a prize! :) 

Please let me know if you would like to be a part of this challenge!  I will be happy to answer any questions you may have!

Looking forward to "walking with you" as we accomplish our health and/or weight loss goals! :)

Here's to a Happy and Healthy 2012!